A wish it shames me to print
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levado de um desejo tão particular que me vexa imprimil-o,
moved by a wish so peculiar it shames me to print it,
moved by a wish so peculiar it shames me to print it,
Here the motive at last: 'levado de um desejo tão particular que me vexa imprimil-o' — moved by a wish so peculiar it shames me to print it. Three things in one clause. First, the passivity again — 'levado', carried along, driven by the wish rather than owning it. Second, the confessed embarrassment: the old man knows his longing is odd, sentimental, faintly ridiculous, and says so, which is exactly what makes us trust and like him. And third, the sly self-consciousness of 'imprimil-o', to print it — he is aware he is publishing his private heart, putting his nostalgia into a book for strangers to read, and the awareness becomes part of the charm. This is Bento's signature move: he discloses a tender, slightly shameful truth about himself, flags his own embarrassment, and in doing so persuades us he is a man who hides nothing. A reader disarmed by so frank a confession about a house is a reader well prepared to take, later, far graver confessions on the same easy trust.
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