
Hermes: gladly, and in triple chains
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τὸν δʼ ἠμείβετʼ ἔπειτα διάκτορος ἀργεϊφόντης·
Hermes — αἲ γὰρ τοῦτο γένοιτο, ἄναξ ἑκατηβόλʼ Ἄπολλον· δεσμοὶ μὲν τρὶς τόσσοι ἀπείρονες ἀμφὶς ἔχοιεν, ὑμεῖς δʼ εἰσορόῳτε θεοὶ πᾶσαί τε θέαιναι, αὐτὰρ ἐγὼν εὕδοιμι παρὰ χρυσέῃ Ἀφροδίτῃ.
Then the guide Argeiphontes answered him: Would that this might come to pass, lord Apollo, far-shooter! Though bonds three times as many, past counting, should hold me round about, and you gods look on, and all the goddesses too — yet I myself would sleep beside golden Aphrodite.
Apollo has just asked Hermes, teasingly, whether he would endure the chains for a night with Aphrodite. Hermes answers.
Hermes gives the answer everyone wants. Let the bonds be three times as many and past all counting, he says; let every god and goddess stand and stare — he would still gladly sleep beside golden Aphrodite. The straight man has delivered the punchline.
The line works because the gods have nothing at stake. Shame is the force that binds mortal lovers, and Hermes waves it away: public exposure, the very trap sprung on Ares, is no deterrent when you are deathless and untouchable. The song is a holiday from the poem's darker weather, where a woman's fidelity and a man's honor are matters of life and death. Here they are the setup for a joke.
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